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sixth, aug tonight is the last night i belong to my hometown. i was born down the road. i got home late, driving through the mazes of my neighborhood, the mazes of all the old friendships that died due to the family moving, a falling out. amazed at how many houses i knew from the inside. i'm leaving town with my ex-girlfriend. huh, it's more personal than just leaving town together. we're splitting the rent of an apartment. and she already has a new boyfriend. of course he doesn't want her moving in with me. yeah, ok, it's a little strange, i'll admit, but maybe someone will read this and base a hilarious sitcom off of it, you know? and everyone will laugh, and laugh...and laugh. why would he like to sever me and her? is he really that selfish? she loves him, i know, and still he really doesn't care, he'd rather i was just a cold memory sinking to the bottom of her head. what he doesn't realize is how wildly intertwined my life is with hers, how much i need her, even if i'm not with her. how much i'd fight to keep her, even though i realize that if she ever left me for good, it would be her choice. even though i know all that. ...i haven't attacked someone since seventh grade; i broke the habit after i stomped the magically pale justin jameson into the ground. my whole body was one crazy leg, kicking him and kicking him until he was the dirt behind the granite boulders. it might be a little awkward at first, trying to hurt this boy like he's hurt me, what with my lack of practice and everything, but i feel like i still have that hate hidden somewhere secret and deep in my legs and that it's simply waiting patiently to conjure me into something red violent. |